Hello world!!! Karri Lauritzen is in the house!!! ;D

Hi everyone! Karri Lauritzen, the “Guest Blogger” here!

Hmmm… I guess it would have been extremely convenient for me to actually REMEMBER what I was asked to blog about. Lol!

Nevertheless, I will proceed.
(blindly)

So, a little bit about myself- god
I am the beginning and the end, the alpha and the omega, the- oh wait, that’s God.

Haha I’m actually just your average chick in life. The girl who loves to shop, dance, eat frozen yogurt, like her own facebook statuses, model, give motivational speeches, write and publish books, you know- the girl whose name you can google and dozens of pages and pics come up, yada yada. 1355902312

I grew up in the foster care system, and attended 18 schools because I moved around 29 times, but who’s counting? ;) I went to college, then on to grad school both in California. I’m very much of a California, city girl.

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I’ve been a model for over 10 years, and now I go around giving motivational speeches for youth in foster care, people with mental illnesses, and for charity events. No biggie. 3251f650c41911e281c522000a9e035f_7

So tell me then why I’m now in random Utah of all places, enjoying western dancing, watching chickens fight, and counting down the days til it snows so I can build a GIGANTIC scary-looking, lopsided snowman in front of the DCFS office in Provo?
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The average chick, right? ;) Hahaha

So I have 3 books published right now, the 4th one is with an editor. 59642501decae5f6563150f72ee1e7c99b875444-thumb

People tell me I’ve had a crazy hard life, and that I should have grown up to be one of those broken people hooked on drugs, caffeine, artificial European nails, and social security income for life, probably divorced out of a domestic violence relationship with an old bald guy with a crooked goatie and a unibrow, who talks with a middle eastern accent, even when he KNOWS he is actually from up north, AND he has 7 kids from other women, drives an ice cream truck when he’s not running his fraudulent marketing corporation pyramid scheme, wears one suspender, eats nasty plastic tasting coconuts, snores without shame in his sleep, and flaunts around his nasty ingrown toenail on his left middle toe!!!!!!! 2hezed5

…but thankfully, I’m not ;)

Instead, I turned out alright. Just stayed positive and pushed through all the trials, trauma, and drama of my upbringing. My real story, I have made into what looks like a children’s book, and call it “The Happy Broken Child,” because instead of being the broken child I should have been, I turned out to be a pretty happy one instead, despite the crazy circumstances I endured.4827560-f9842725beafc4657d6c1ea98843d9f4-fp-a6ed9606405200e8306f42cee563678f

Here it is—> http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.blurb.com%2Fb%2F4420112-the-happy-broken-child&h=QAQFkf4f4

If you’re curious about my other books that I have published, or about my credibility to write this blog, or the modeling experience, etc, google me.

THIS JUST IN!!! KARRI LAURITZEN HAS OFFICIALLY REMEMBERED WHAT HER BLOG ASSIGNMENT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ABOUT!!!

Country dancing!!! (…ain’t nobody got time for that!) dancing-wrong-demotivational-poster

So as I briefly mentioned earlier, I went country dancing last night, and TOTALLY got tossed around like a rodeo whip in the hands of a happy hillbilly bull rider! I’m pretty sure the cops were waiting on standby outside of the Westerner, because I screamed like I was getting murdered on that dance floor when my partners flipped and tossed me around! But despite my love and hands-down preference for hip hop and breakdancing, I actually had alot of fun! Dancing_skull

I’ve noticed a HUGE difference in the way we dance in Cali vs UTah, in my own experience.

In Utah, guys actually come up to you, hold out their hand, and ask you if you would like to dance with them.
In California, guys rarely even ask girls to dance! And when they do, it’s usually for slow songs, and it’s rare for them to actually be somewhat decent at it.
In Utah, between the flips, swings, and tosses in the air, guys talk to you when they’re dancing,
In California, the music is so loud and the guys don’t know how to talk to girls respectfully. …Kinda hard to speak respectfully to someone, or even think about them respectfully when you’re grinding on them ;)
In Utah, guys are not afraid to ask you for your number if they enjoyed your company dancing that night. They let you know that they would like to get to know you better.
In California, guys ask for your name, send you a facebook friend request, do a background and body check by stalking your facebook account or a few days, and then, if you’re lucky, they’ll send you an invite to a hang out or ask you out over an instant message. LAME!!!

There’s so much more I can say about it, but I don’t want to be on anyone’s hitlist when I come back home for the Christmas break, so I’ll refrain. Lol I’m not saying Utah is a perfect, happy valley bubble or anything, but yes, I enjoy the Utah style of dancing. We need more of this style in California. ;D

So that’s my 99 cents for the day. Thanks for allowing me to manipulate your horizontal occipital lobe movements for the last 6 minutes ;) Your cognitive re-genesis and mindset reactivation will be used for a good cause (we need more minds to unconsciously work on sickle cell and chromosomal alteration, so thank you for involuntarily volunteering). eyeball-popper_2

Please feel free to leave me comments, likes, or facebook shares! Enjoy the rest of your day!


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